Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
I have a bit of free time, and I've been livestreaming a bit. so, sometime today or tomorrow I'll be making a giveaway thingy with 3 free comissions.
today was shit. my class is at war... split into 2 Groups.. it seems solved, but my side won't stop talking mean about them. forgive and forget already! please...

And ofcourse.. in PE today we ran, and had to sprint. My lungs gave up on me, and my breah rattled awfully... I ended up throwing myself at the empty tribunes, trying to make it stop, but too much adrenalin and fear had already overtaken my mind. it wa terrifying. I couldn't breathe. and everyone saw me cry like a baby, panicking and grasping my throat.

So, when I got home... I went silently to my room, and began hitting. I ended up crying so loudy my mother heard and came to see. She never saw my agressive selfhate. but she saw the tears and he weakness in my eyes. It's so disgraceful for me to let my guard down like that. and I punished myself. I can hardly feel my left leg right now.. so I know it won't happen again. I deserved it for embarrassing myself in such a way..

Have a great morning/day/evening or night.
  • Listening to: I'm not a robot -marina and the diamonds
  • Playing: Skyrim: the elder scrolls
I have written a new story.. rated mature.. *//^//*
Aand I was concidering making a serie out of it. Ehm.. I will upload it later tonight. c: hope ya'll like it! Even though you may find that I am one of the most perverted things on the earth's surface.. xD
Oh well hello there :D *eerie high pitched volumes play*

My babymaker parts have been hurting an awful lot this evening. (22:00 Danish time)
And it just so happens, my period doesn't start until tomorrow. this is both a Blessing and a death sentence.

'Cause honestly, (caution I may be creating time rifts in space and insult someone..) But this feels like you need to fart really damn bad, and ye can't. cause it's just your dang uturus making your life suck. really. damn. bad.

I hate life. but hey, i am home alone until tomorrow midnight-ish... so no one will hear my victims scream as I cut the poor men open for not feeling this. I will eat their insides.

hehe, no. XD but yeah, this week will be hell. So, if any, expect really bloody, murderou stuff from me..

I am so so sorry XD you probs didn't need to hear this.
(and why is there no mood smiley for bleeding a week?!)
  • Listening to: Laurel - to the hills
  • Reading: The black stallion (in english, yasss!)
  • Watching: The walking dead
  • Playing: Titanfall
  • Eating: men's intestines
  • Drinking: their blood, pretending to get drunk as if wine.


Bullet; Red The first 20 people that comment on this journal will be featured below and I'll choose three deviations I like most from their gallery. 

Bullet; Red If you comment, you must do the same in your journal, putting the tagger (me) and three pieces of my art on the first place. 

Bullet; Red The idea of this is not to get a free feature, but to spread and share art around for everyone. 

This seemed like a really fun sort of tag so I decided to try it out. :D (Big Grin) 

1. :icontarnisis: 



















I've been through a ot of different hells.
I become 17 years old in 2 days. And you all expect me to be happy. But in reality, I sit in the shower cabin, crying and screaming. Because no matter how many years it was since the last time someone hurt me. Really hurt me on purpose. I will never forget it. And I am sad, I should've died 5 years ago. Before everything truly fell apart. Maybe I did die. But they should've said something. but oh no, I was left alone, to suffer. I asked them, tears in my eyes, CAN'T YOU SEE WHAT'S GOING ON?! they nodded quietly, but said nothing, they only walked away. avoided me. I am surviver of war. serveral wars. I am a veteran! But no one knows. I didn't tell anyone when I exchanged again. I never trusted anyone. I still don't completely. New friends. bad start. I'm really sorry.. because I know, too soon they will leave me too. Why would they stay? honestly, ha! Nobody cares about my ass! Maybe a certain male did, but alas, he grew tired too. I could see it in his eyes. Sometimes, the Little sick lady got worse. I had nightmares, and woke up crying. But I couldn't move. I always have to be aware of my breathing, because if I don't order myself to breathe, then I don't. He found out. He almost killed me, trying to get me to breathe. I am so tired, and it feels so nice to just... not. I stop breathing for almost 2 minutes. it Hurts when I try again. It makes me heavy. Sometimes all I need is a hug. A good, sincere one. and just crying into their chest. give in to it. to actually admit, I am NOT okay. I haven't been okay most of my life! from the fucking start, my father had temper issues, and that turned me into a monster. No mistakes were allowed. none. and I still can't accept if I make any. I break Down. So no, it won't be a happy birthday. Better than others true, because this time.. I have a few people that I've grown to love over the past month... and that certain male ofcourse.. It Means a lot to me. They just don't know exactly how much. When I cry and tell them how happy I am. They will never know, that they are the first friends I've had around me. outside my room. away from the safety of being able to block a person from ever finding you again. I really love them. So please, please. Don't ever let god take them from me.… Yus!
I have been tagged for this by :iconbel-thesweet-sylveon: ! :D


1. For peeps to be happy! XD (wierd one..)
2. A drawing of me and my boyfriend together... (I have pictures!)
3. To one day meet :icontheboiyaidragon: in person !
4. To go to Bosei again next summer (which will most likely happen)
5. To have a happy future with Lucas. (which will most likely also happen)
6. getting better...maybe even get rid of PTSD completely.. (the last will most likely not happen..)
7. To have a happy christmas with the family.. which means; that they won't notice me much and just not get angry with eachother.


I tag : :icontheboiyaidragon: :iconwandering-wolf666: :iconsheltiejoy: and :iconchaoszebra:
finally decided to do this XD
(the amount of characters in any offer will NOT change the price)
Sketch: 2 :points:
lines: 4 :points:
lines + color (shading included): 5 :points:
lines + color (shading included) + background: 6 :points:    Sheera by JovaArt
siluette: free                                                                    Will you be here when I wake up? by JovaArt
mini painting: 3 :points:                                                   For Him by JovaArt
cartoon page: 6 :points:                                                   Fates tied by Love by JovaArt
1) What do you plan to do this Halloween?
I plan on going out trick-or-treating with a couple of friends and my boyfriend

2) What was/is you fave costume E-V-E-R?
probably my Alice in walkerland costume XD (the walking dead x alice in wonderland)

3) What is your favorite candy?
I don't really have a faverourite... liquorice maybe? salty~

4) Do you like scary movies?
No. :<

5) Do go out trick-or-treating with only one or two friends,  or a big group?
A group, not big, only about 3-5 peeps

6) Do you ever take you pets trick-or-treating?
I did once.. I had a horse, some imagination and some serious fun :D people got a lil jumpscare from the horse face in their door opening.

7) Do you have any phobias?
ehm...the thought of deep water? other than that, I' just call it common sense

8) What is your favorite horror movie? (it does not have to be related to Halloween) 
I don't have any ._. I am too easily moved by horror movies, and sometimes have a real hard time because I hallucinate and can't tell nightmares from reality

9) What is your fave holiday ALL-TIME memory?
that was the horse halloween :D

10) What is your fave holiday?
any holiday with the chance of cosplaying and dressing up

I tag:
:icontheboiyaidragon:, :iconbel-thesweet-sylveon: and :iconovercastcloud: !
HI! I am sooo horrifyingly horribly sorry for being so long gone :C really... my browser messed up, and I've changed to firefox instead :D nevermind that-

I will soon be uploading all the crap that I've drawn, because i am currently ill, so I've drawn a lot.. including a picture of a beautiful moment in ze Eiffel towah :3 with ze boyfriend hihi..

Life's great,  glad to be back, hope you're all still alive out there :D
First, I am going to paris, france from sunday to thursday with my class! yay! 
second; I have a boyfriend.. :blush: And he's in my class, so he'll be there too~! romance here I come! 
join me ! I dare yew! :D 
continueing 'I'm tired of being afraid' painting :)
so, I'm going to try out some more anthro art such as Lukas. :D  I'm planning on making a male wolf to be his bud and ofcourse a girl ^.^ 
the guy will be named Keith..I think..and the girl Sarah... (the girl will be wolfdog too, only with finnish shepherd in stead og husky) :D (title says it all :P ) (title says it all :P )
Comment and I'll...
1. Tell you something I learned about you by looking at your dA page for 13 seconds. 
2. Tell you what color you remind me of.
3. Tell you what element I think you belong to e.g. water, fire, air, etc.
4. Tell you what comic, manga/ anime, or video GAME character you remind me of. 
5. Ask you a question, and you must answer. 
6. Tell you something I like about you. 
7. Give you a nickname. 
8. Tell you what object is to the left of me. 
9. Tell you what food/ flavor/ smell you remind me of.
10. Tell you to do one in your journal too. 

So, as you might know, I've started on a comic called 'fates tied by love' 
and I am hoping to realease a page every friday or so. Maybe earlier / 2 a week. I have already (during my time at Bosei) sketched up to 6 pages :D now I'm just digitalizng. 

I was hoping to hear if anyone will be reading it? or anyadvise already? X3   

anyway, next page is done soon ^.^ have a nice day/night !